If ever you cherish... @ Saturday, September 22, 2007
Friday~
Was awaken by boy calling.
Promise to go out with them derh.
Mummy treat me eat buffet.
The international dunno wad buffet larh.
We take cab to tampiness.
I love the cheesecake=)
Really thank mummy for treating me.
When passing by the temple this two days.
I suddenly think of fabian.
The memories we had when we went to och.
But is not like how i used to think in the past.
After eating, mummy went to kovan clinic.
To me at that moment i heard that, i nvr think of anything.
Going to kovan, i won't fear anymore.
As the cab was reaching, passing by 212 coffeeshop the place when i and him really used to slack at.
I saw him while the cab passes by.
Fabian !
That what appear in my mind for that few moments.
Did i saw wrongly or is my eye playing a trick on me?
I ask meng to accompany me to go and confirm is it that i mistaken.
I told meng that if it was really him, can i grab his hand and walk like we were couple.
I wanna prove to him that i am happy even without him in my life.
But i knew it wasn't from the very start we agree not to contact anymore.
My life was nvr happy ever since he left.
That is everyone who know me know derh.
Passing by him, i was more confirm that my eyes aren't not playing trick on me.
He cut his hair.
Seriously more handsome.
And he is sitting with his gf and a big grp of ppl.
I hope his life was happy too.
But after all it make me confirm that i really have given up on him.
But my mind was in a mess.
Really very confused.
How i hope that when i was really in a mess , he will be with me or at least pei me talk on phone.
But i can't find him.
When i contact him, he stead was at his hse.
That make me more sad.
I kept think and thinking.
What am i to him now?
We can be nth more but just fren.
I feel like i am being the third party between him and his stead.
That feeling suck like hell.
I told serene if i really can dun contact him, i will.
But i love him like how i once love fabian.
My feeling seriously very suck now.
Like feeling very heavy going to stop breathing anytime.
I wish that he can accompany me on phone through the night but he fell sick.
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